From Tom: This is my daughter, Sarah Keegan. I took this picture after she got home from her high school prom. Not the most flattering picture, but a very important picture. I was tired from waiting for her. She was exhausted from dancing, having a blast with her friends...and being chosen as the Prom Queen. The picture is important, not because of the crown, but because of what happened after it was taken.
Sarah took off the crown and said, "It’s so heavy." I took it from her and felt its weight. It was heavy. I said, "It should be heavy. Being your high school's prom queen means a lot." She took the crown back and smiled. She then said, "Dad, I'm too tired to talk tonight. Is it ok if I just go to sleep?" You see each night Sarah and I talk about her day before she goes to bed. She has a "superpower." Like an empath, she is highly tuned into everybody's emotions. It can be hard for her to process what she picks up from other people. All day long, at school and work, she takes in other people's anger, bitterness, anxieties and fears, love, joy, and happiness; all of it and in a way that sometimes boggles my mind. She feels what they feel. So, each night we talk about it. It helps her to talk it out so she can get to sleep.
But last Saturday she was "too tired" so I told her we could talk in the morning and off she went to get ready for bed. A few minutes later she called out to me, "Dad. Can we talk?" I made my way to her room thinking there were probably a lot of emotions swirling around. As I entered her room, I said, "I bet there were a lot of feelings that you had to deal with tonight." She looked at me and said, "Oh yeah, but everyone was in a happy, fun mood tonight. That's not what I want to talk about." Hmmm, I thought, "Well what do you want to talk about then?" She pointed at the crown sitting on her dresser and said, "I don't deserve that." I was a bit caught off guard.
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"Oh? Why do you say that?" I asked. She looked at me with a little sadness in her eyes and said, "I'm not the most beautiful girl." Yikes...time to put on your super Dad persona I thought to myself. "What makes you say that?" I asked. She looked at me and said, "I just know." I then thought about something that had happened a few days before and asked, "Do you remember what happened when you and I went out to dinner and the hostess was super excited to see you and gave you a big hug when we walked in?" She smiled and nodded. I continued. "Why was she so happy to see you?" She had to think a minute, "Well I know her from school, and I was able to make her happy sometimes when she was sad." I looked at her, smiled, and said, "I think that is beautiful, don't you?" She nodded. I then said, "Do you remember that time that you and your classmate hung out together. Why did you want to invite her to hang out with you?" She thought a minute, "Well, I felt like she needed a friend." I looked at her and said, "I think being there for someone when they need a friend is beautiful, don't you?" She looked at me a nodded. I then said, "Tell me about all those times that we go through various drive throughs and the person in the window calls out to you and seems so happy to see you or when we go to the mall, and everyone is saying hello to you. What is all that about?"
She got a serious look on her face and said, "well at school sometimes people use bad words, or yell at other people in a mean way and I don't think it is right, so I say something to the person who is being bad. A lot of people know me because of that." I nodded with an equally serious look on my face and said, "I think it is important to speak up against bad things and I think it is a beautiful thing that you stand up for other people when someone might be hurting them with words. Don't you think that is a beautiful thing?" She smiled and nodded. I showed her a picture on my phone. Look at this picture and tell me what is going on here. She looked at the picture and said, "That’s the time I introduced the Gold Medal Olympics guy at the Include Me conference." I nodded, "Yeah and why do you think they asked you to introduce him?" She shrugged her shoulders. I said, "Sarah, you always make other people feel special and included. You lift other people up. You can tell how people are feeling, and you know just how to help them feel better. I think they wanted you to do that for him and I think it is a beautiful thing every time you do it." I looked at her and said, "You are a very beautiful woman. You may not be the most glamorous, but you are beautiful. It is not my place to say whether you "deserve" that crown, however, obviously most of your senior class thinks you do." She smiled and said, "Really?" I nodded. "Thanks Dad! I think I am ready to go to sleep now." I bowed deeply and asked, "Am I dismissed Your Highness?" She laughed, "You’re so silly Dad. I love you!" And just like that, my "queen" rolled over and went to sleep.
By Tom Keegan